"Honesty brings Peace" which means there is no peace in our home. At this point I don't even think of it as a home. I have a feeling we are at a low. I wish I could say my child is at a low and I am there to lift him. But it seems that he pulls us all into his hole, even the new puppy. I am there to lift him. There are just some days that I am stronger than other days.
It would be so much easier to be compassionate if I knew he was genuine. That brings up a whole other topic: What does it mean to be genuine? I will save that for another day. Or ponder that today.
Anyway, it seems like he is always thinking from his head and when there is nothing in his head he cries, pouts, hits himself or my favorite, silence. And I have to be kind, calm and patient. Over and over again, the cycle never seems to end.
Today I am posting because our trust in him has basically diminished. I am having a hard time with my compassion for him when I can not communicate with him.
I read somewhere recently (Sorry I can not cite this) to be thankful for breathing in and out. This has been my mantra during these hard times and has helped And even my child's breathe.
I wish I had the words to communicate my thoughts to you....your pain is mine...your stress is mine.....your helplessness, hopelessness, loneliness,uncertainty,your love is mine.....you know you are loved and cared for...I believe that is really all you want for you and your son....IALAC....I had a cartoon character of a boy with a sign around his neck in my classroom for years that said "IALAC"..it seemed simple to say and believe. "I Am Loveable and Capable"....since RAD has entered our family I realize what an enormous challenge it is for some to believe this...
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